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Starting her third year of marriage, Carrie Monroe O’Keefe had already been on the roller coaster of extreme highs and lows of a newly blended family. Thinking she could do a better job of navigating marriage, stepmotherhood, working full time, and all of the things, she embarked on a year of “what if.”
Settling into her role as wife and mom, she tried to find ways to do things better, see things differently, and reframe her thinking to create a better home for her family and to feel more at home herself. With humor, unwavering honesty, vulnerability, and sarcasm, Carrie finds her way through the year and to her true self.
From Chapter: A Real Mom After All
No one can fully prepare you for the journey of being a stepmom. In the early days, I doubted myself daily, suffered from depression, considered divorce, and constantly questioned the meaning and viability of our relationship. My relationship with my little girls that is.
I had to look at the kind of mom I wanted to be and the kind of mom I actually was. Because we only have our little girls half the time, I was consumed with worry about what their life was like when they weren’t with us. However, this only led to me being too uptight, too rigid, and too crabby. When they came home, the worry subsided but then I turned into a crazy mom, constantly trying to have everything work perfectly. Which, obviously, isn’t a thing.
It took a while, but eventually everything just kind of fell into place. I stopped worrying what people thought about how I parent. I stopped caring whether others viewed me as one of the little girls’ moms. Most importantly, I stopped trying to compare myself to someone else. Finally, I decided I was one of their parents and I do, in fact, matter. I’m playing an important part in how these little girls will grow up, how they’ll turn out and who they’ll become. I am one of their moms.
About the Author:
Carrie Monroe O’Keefe started blogging about her life by sharing stories of marriage, stepmotherhood, and how to navigate it all on mamacadabra.com in 2012. People said they loved reading the posts, so she kept writing. In addition to blogging, she released her middle-grade fiction book, The Whole Truth, in 2019.
Carrie lives outside of Minneapolis with her husband, two daughters, and dog Finlay.
