This post is part of a virtual book tour organized by Goddess Fish Promotions. David Beem will be awarding a $50 Amazon or Barnes and Noble GC to a randomly drawn winner via rafflecopter during the tour. Click on the tour banner to see the other stops on the tour.
It’s been said every story must start somewhere. Ours begins with a professional dork. The kind who fixes computers and lives in his gran’s basement. The kind tapped by destiny (that saucy minx) to become the world’s first superhero!
And not a moment too soon…
A nano-sized artificial intelligence is on the loose! It got itself dart-gunned into a cow butt by a frog man in a porn store! Two stoners are corrupting it on twitter! And that’s just the first three pages!!
Join our dork of destiny as he channels the collective unconscious—his psychic superpower—in a harrowing tale of high drama, romance, betrayal, revenge, jesus chickens, cocaine, weirdos, magicians, ninjas, nfl spies, and disco ball water torture administered to the tune of rapture, by blondie. My god, man, what does it all mean!?
It means uncorking that next bottle of wine isn’t only a good idea—it’s advisable.
Enjoy an Excerpt:
“Morning, sleepyhead.”
I roll onto my side. A bar of honey-golden sunlight is bisecting a bare and definitely female leg in my bed.
Something like a popped clutch hitches in my chest.
I snatch the blankets and try to yank them up to my neck. They won’t come, because Mary—beautiful Mary Thomas—is sitting on the edge of my bed. The blankets are trapped beneath her beautiful butt, which happens to be wearing my favorite boxers. And the rest of her is in my Notre Dame jersey.
“What’re you—how’re you—what’re you—are you wearing my clothes?”
“I got to thinking,” she says, standing and sashaying over to my desk, where she picks up the picture of me and Dad. Her blonde hair is gleaming in the morning sunlight. Her legs are long, toned, and tan. I bite the side of my tongue, and my gaze snaps to eye level just in time; she sets down the picture and faces me.
“I’m going to help you.”
I yank my sheets up to my neck and count to ten. I’ve missed something. Maybe more than one critical something. Probably an entire chapter of critical somethings torn from the story of my life while I was sleeping.
I release the sheets and sit up. “How did you get in here?”
“Through the window.”
“I mean—okay. Not to be rude or anything, but…why are you in my room?”
“I’m glad you asked that, Edger,” she says, like her sitting at my desk and wearing my boxers and jersey is the most normal freaking thing in the history of normal freaking things. “I know we just met yesterday, but I think it’s time we moved in together.”
About the Author:David Beem enjoys superhero movies, taekwondo, and flossing. He lives in Djibouti with his family and crippling self-doubt. Help actualize David’s inner confidence. Visit his website today, and buy all the stuff.
Buy the book at Amazon.
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I enjoyed getting to know your book; congrats on the tour, I hope it is a fun one for you, and thanks for the chance to win 🙂
Thank you for hosting, Lisa! It’s been fun so far.
Anyone who may be interested in learning more about the book, I’ll be checking back throughout the day and would love to hear from readers!
Cheers!
Thanks for hosting!
Interesting cover. Sounds good.
Thanks, Kim. We were working on that cover for a LONG time. There’s an old, slightly risque Bond poster for For Your Eyes Only which has similar composition, and was later reimagined for the romantic comedy/spy TV series Chuck, on NBC. I started writing Edger after binge-watching Chuck with my wife b/c we enjoyed the show so much and wanted more. At the same time, I was re-reading Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy and Good Omens, two of my comedy fiction faves, and we’ve long been fans of superhero movies. Edger is kind of an almagamation of all these influences, but the cover owes most to Chuck and James Bond. Hey, Kim–thanks for stopping by!
Do you ever suffer from writer’s block and, if so, how do you overcome it?
Hi, Peggy!
You sound like a writer. 😉
YES, I do sometimes suffer from writer’s block. In fact, I’m in the midst of it right now with the sequel to Edger. (After the initial burst of about 40k words.) When hitting a block, I will often back off and do some other things on my to-do list, which is always longer than it should be. If I can’t, and there’s a deadline, I try to answer the question: What *must* happen next (in story)? Often the answer is very general: character A must go from point B to C. But even a general answer is enough to begin whittling away at problem by asking increasingly specific questions about what happens next. (For example, HOW does character A get from point B to C?) Eventually you’ve got something to put down page. The result may come out very technical in first draft. Sentences like “Peggy gets into the car and turns the ignition,” which isn’t pretty to read pages of, but it produces the first draft and can be refined later. Editing is *always* my preferred activity, b/c it’s fixing. But you can’t fix it if it ain’t on the page, so even lame prose which advances plot is better than no prose, no book.
I’m curious to hear how YOU handle writer’s block. One can’t have too many tools in the toolbox. 😉
Thank you for stopping by, Peggy!
I liked the excerpt, thank you.
I’m glad to hear that, Rita! Thank you for stopping by and saying hello!!
Great excerpt & awesome giveaway 🙂
Thank you, Victoria!
I like the premise!
Awesome, Trix. I do too! 😉 Thanks for stopping by!